Wednesday, September 7, 2011

A New Project and A New Beginning for a Old Life, or, In Other News, I Gotta Get a Camera

I want to be a writer, but like a lot of things I'd like to be (an excellent dancer, a stellar mixer of drinks, a girl who owns a car with a working radio that is clean enough for other people to sit in) I haven't been doing enough of the work. Sure I have short fiction I've let ( forced) friends and loved ones read and I'm up on all my new hip writers, literary magazines and the like, I haven't been finding ways to do what I love. Instead, I've let it sit on the back burner so I can do stuff I instead that find to be
1. somewhat entertaining
2. mind-numbing
3. necessary for purpose of making money, staying employed, keeping friends and loved ones, not going completely crazy.

Can I tell you what's going on in True Blood, what is was like to actually sit through and pay for Shark Night 3D, how to cook a delicious chicken, how to dress for and around a larger posterior, where to get delicious Korean BBQ, and how to do a great cat-eyeliner look? Absolutely.

But I ask myself, (and I suppose if you're reading this too, you must be asking yourself) how happy am I? and beyond that, how joyful am I? And when I do stuff I love ( like cooking a scrumptious meal, taking a walk around the neighborhood, getting the perfect Audrey Hepburn eye down, making a five year old smile in the grocery store line, laughing to tears with someone I love)

Like most people I go through days where I don't count my blessing, don't tap into the things I get joy from. And maybe some of the earlier mentioned items do happen to bring me pretty genuine and palpable joy, even though I can accept how silly, insignificant/ unimportant in the long run they are.

What I know for sure is this:

  • I have let too many perfectly lovely days go by without noticing how singularly exciting and beautiful they are. 
  • I've let my passing interactions with others sometimes lose that special exciting quality being that we don't know each other, but we could. Though strangers can be scary kids, I know you know they can be pretty exciting too. I can face you, look you in the eye.  I can notice small details about you, can pay you a compliment, can effect your current feelings and even your day with an act as small as a smile. I've let those moments become mundane and don't value them as they pass.
  •  I don't often tell the people I love, like and effect me in small way how they do that, and how grateful I am that they do.
  • I need to pay more attention to my life and work at the things I like/ want/ love/ need instead of expecting the universe to just drop them in my lap.
This is a blog/ manifesto/ project for me to take a moment every day and find something unique, silly, wonderful, special and joyful. I'll be making this 1 thing my medicine, and in this case the doctor's orders will be to take one daily.
some of these things are sure to be heavy and important while i know somethings will maybe be a little bit shallow and silly, but hey, who made it a law I can't find some little retreat in eating straight cookie dough, reading us weekly in a bathtub and then blowing out my hair?

If it makes me happy, it'll be here. I also may add some random articles in regard to my job, news, my city, fashion, Los Angeles, and my struggles. I'm happy to have you along for the ride and look forward to hearing from you about the things you dig, that give you comfort and that make this crazy ride worth it.  I'm jazzed to have you, and excited to begin this. 

On my to do list, I'd like to get a camera since I have a pretty low-brow cell phone (no internet, pixely photos and actual keys but can get dropped 15 times a day and still operate like a champ.) I'm thinking taking some photos would be a helpful motivator for me plus a great way to look back and get a visual on this kooky little project. Hopefully, pay check gods allowing I can get a spiffy little digital camera here in the next week or so. If anyone out there is even reading this yet, please leave any comments of a good affordable digital camera, preferably something on the small side and easy to use. otherwise, I'll probably buy whatever's cheap and i can get my hands on quickly.

Yes, that's impatience you may have been sensing. 


I can't wait.

Let's Go!